Clinton says Cheney Not a "Reliable Source"

...."And I oughta know," said Clinton. "After all, my husband was proven 'not a reliable source' during sworn grand jury testimony."  (inspired by this)   -CE

NEWS: Living Increases Risk of Dying

Studies show that for anyone aged 5 and older in the US, continuing to live increases your risk of dying. - CE

McCain Campaign Mgr Blames Republicans

Phoenix, AZ--Steve Schmidt, John McCain's campaign manager, blamed the Republican party for his candidate's loss in the 2008 election.

"It wasn't the candidate. It certainly wasn't his campaign staffers or manager. It was the fact that the Republican party needs to change, primarily by giving up its core beliefs. The party needs to embrace health care reform, illegal immigration, abortion, the reduction of emissions to stop global warming, gay marriage, and stem cell research. It also needs to be okay with higher spending, and not as irresponsible with tax decreases. It needs to mirror, as exactly as possible, elite media opinion. In short, the Republican party needs to become the Democratic party!"

Another McCain staffer gave Schmidt high marks for his ability to cover his ass. "Impressive! Despite the party nominating the most centrist candidate available, Schmidt was able to still blame the party!"

N. Korea Weeps after UN Ambassador's Threat

Pyongyang, North Korea-- After hearing the comments from Obama appointee Susan Rice suggesting that North Korea must change in order to "join the community of nations," weeps and sighs spread over the land north of the DMZ.

"Oh we so wanted to join the community of nations!" cried one elderly man, who said that his one wish for his children is that they experience a North Korea in which the people in California think well of them. "I wake up every morning saddened to learn the ill opinion that the diplomats in Brussels have of us."

Another Obama administration staffer said last Friday that unless North Korea abolishes its nuclear program that the world will think of Kim Il-sung the way they think of George Bush.

"No, no, no! Not George Bush!" said one woman when told of the comparison. "We have to abolish our nuclear program...the next thing you know they'll be calling Dear Leader a neocon!"

Obama Bows to Human Rights Abuse?

See this:



Now read this. - CE