Laconic Cowboy Last to Join Facebook

Dead Gulch, AZ-- Laconic cowboy Terrence "Shooter" Orville became the last American to join Facebook.



"My sister in Memphis wanted me to join up, though I ain't got much to say," said Mr. Orville.

A quick look at Mr. Orville's "wall" confirms that. Since joining four months ago his only activity was to "like" the pop group ABBA.

Library Facilitates Its Own Demise

The Buckinghamshire public library has solved the problem of finding a place for all those books: just lock the doors and send everyone home -- library closed!

"Teachable Moment" an Oxymoron

A study released today by the University of Chicago showed that any moment labeled "teachable" by the media will, in fact, ensure the opposite.

"We found that use of the phrase 'teachable moment' was a turn-off. Generally, if you have to attempt to label it as teachable then, by definition, it's not. Teachable moments come through hard experience, not through partisan media blowhards lecturing the American people."

Other researchers concur, including one University of Michigan professor who questioned the wisdom of national conversations.

"We need to have a national conversation on whether there should be a moratorium on national conversations."

What's that old saying....?

Never bring a wheelchair to a gunfight?