The Carville-Matalin Show

Get ready for everybody's favorite politically dysfunctional family...

The Matalin-Carville Family Sitcom! ("That's Carville-Matalin, Honey!") (cue laugh track)

Mary: "Honey, the kids missed the bus. Can you take them?"

James: "That's the third time in two weeks! Think of our carbon footprint!"

Mary: "Have you forgotten that liberals don't believe in personal responsibility but in government mandates?"

James: "Oh that's right. Just another reason I love being a Democrat!" (cue laugh track)

(Eleven hours later)

James: "Honey, I'm home!"

Mary: "Hi, my cute little snake-eyed, bald-headed socialist! How was your day?"

James: "Hey did you just call me a socialist?" (cue laugh track)

Mary: "Only as a term of endearment sweetie."

James: "Well your gun-totin', God-fearin', pro-life, patriotic Republican friends have the nerve to call Obama a socialist!"

Mary: "Well y'all should've nominated Hillary then."

James: "Y'all'd be calling Hillary a socialist by now too."

Mary: "But that wouldn't fly since everyone knows Hillary's a Hillaryist. She's for anything that would get her elected!"  (cue laugh track)

(Later that night...)

James: "Let's snuggle up and whisper sweet capital gains hikes in each others ears!"

Mary: "You mean cuts honey, and you know I can't resist it you when you talk dirty." (cue laugh track)